The CEO with 100-hour work weeks, an arranged marriage and a global career

Father of 21-year-old twins. A husband still learning how to be married all these years later. “In India, we marry once, and we stay married forever,” he says of his arranged marriage. He does not know how to be a husband any other way.

Now 63, the march toward finiteness has begun. Every now and then, he watches tennis and still loses himself in cricket. It was one of the few indulgences he allowed himself, he says, “just being yourself, a full day without thinking about anything.”

He refuses to take stress to heart. For what? Stress, to him, is a distraction from living. And if his life is a manifestation of anything, it is this: it’s not so much that time passes, but that it passes us by.

What can you tell me about yourself that your business card doesn’t?

I grew up middle class and have been blessed to work in leading organisations at leadership levels, helping create something in the technology industry.

Is it true that tech gurus and bros are “boring”?

I am not. I’m very excited by innovation and entertainment, and I like to watch sports. I watch a lot of movies, and I like to play with gadgets. I like a lot of creativity around me, so I’m not boring. But I’m also not the crazy, outgoing type.

How do you unplug from technology?

Maybe by watching a game of cricket or tennis. I watch my favourite Bollywood movies. I go out with my family a lot on holidays, so I take at least a couple of holidays a year. But I put in 100-hour weeks when I’m working, and then I switch off when I’m not working to spend time with family, release my mental energy and recharge.

Do you travel often?

About 25 days a month.

That’s a lot. What does travel mean to you now?

Travel has been part of my life. I started my career in a company called Wipro in India, where I worked for four years, and then I spent most of the remaining part of my career in Singapore, almost 18 years with Hewlett Packard.

I travelled all around the world, worked across six continents, and then I did a startup before Redington. I love travelling, and I’ve visited about 53 countries. I love getting to know cultures, tasting food and visiting places.

How has travel changed you?

It has made me more adaptable and nimbler because you pretty much have a laptop, a phone, a suitcase with clothes, and your work papers. You have to spend time with family on a phone call whenever you get time.

What’s your travel pro tip that works across all the continents?

Be open-minded, not judgmental. Never get hassled because you might miss flights, or you might not get check-in at a hotel on time. If you keep your cool and are patient, you will enjoy it. But if you are very particular and sticky, it’s very difficult to travel.

Recently, I took my family to China, it was their first time, and it was cold, about minus four degrees, but it was an amazing trip because we went to four cities in six days.

Where do you still dream of going?

Haha! I don’t think there are too many places I aspire to go anymore. I want to do the Mediterranean cruise and see the Northern Lights. I also want to go to the Caribbean.

What kind of a dad are you?

I think I’m a very open-minded dad, where my children can communicate with me. I have fraternal twins, a boy and a girl, 21 years old. We’re more like friends. I consult them about holidays, and they come to me for career advice. But again, this question you have to ask them [chuckles].

Do they dream of being just like dad?

Not really. Both of them are very talented and competent in their own ways. One is into computer science and AI, and the other is into sustainability. Obviously, as they were growing up, if I had travelled less, I could have spent more time with them.

Is that a regret for you? Not spending enough time with them?

A bit, but I think I’ve done a decent job. I love what I do. I love the work. I love my family. I love travelling. I love the time I get to be with myself. I have a fine balance, but I’m very focused on work.

How have you survived parenthood throughout such a demanding career?

When you have goals, you work towards them. I have personal goals, work goals, and parental goals. I want to make sure my children are responsible and have the best education. I made sure that when they got into university, I was there, and when they needed career advice, I was there. I have never felt stressed out because of parenthood and work.

Did you plan your career, or were you the kind who figured it out on the go?

It would be a lie to say that I planned it out. I clearly drove many parts of it. I graduated from one of the premier institutions in India, IIT (Indian Institutes of Technology), in engineering.

Then I attended a premier MBA school in India, IIM (Indian Institute of Management). I could have gone into banking, which was the usual choice then, but I chose the computer industry, and now we are here. I drove the choices, but did I plan it ahead of time? No.

Hari, what does success make easier, and what does it make harder?

Harder because once you are successful, people expect you to be successful every day, every week, every month. Success makes it easier because you build credibility around it, and people say, “We should follow him.” But there is also expectation, and it becomes lonely after some time because you have your share of failures and mistakes, and you take them hard on yourself, but there’s no one to share with.

What can you tell me about success that only you can?

It’s a very easy thing. You have to get up in the morning, whatever title you have, and think it’s a new day in your life, and you have to work hard to be successful.

The tennis legend Roger Federer said that in his life he has won 85 percent of his matches, but only 54 percent of all the points he’s played. So, he’s won only one in two points, but he’s won eight and a half out of all the slams. When it’s behind you, it’s behind you; commit to the next point.

Did success taste as good as you thought it would?

Absolutely. When you are successful, you like what you have done, have immense satisfaction, and build good relationships with people. For me, success is about the footprint you leave behind, not money or titles. Even with my children, the way I look at it, I have played a subtle influence in their lives.

Speaking of, what is something you are proud of but never get to brag about?

I think a big part of my career is the fact that I have worked on creating a business from zero to five million dollars as a startup, five to 50, 50 to 500, and run a corporation that is $13.5 billion. I have worked in multiple countries and built small and medium-scale businesses. Very few people have that gamut of experience.

What is the weirdest piece of advice you have given yourself?

Be humble; you should never let anything go to your head. Be respectful of people.

What do you think is your weakness?

I am a very trusting person. And you know the world is made up of different kinds of people. There are a lot of people in it for themselves, and sometimes maybe I have a gap in judgment because I trust too easily.

How do you know whether you can trust someone?

I just blindly trust because I respect people at face value. But that may be the biggest learning I have had in my life because I have had many failures because of that.

Are you leading with the heart or the head?

It’s a combination. I think when it comes to business decisions, I am very analytical, rational, completely from the head. There is very little heart involved. But there is always a softer aspect to decisions, which has a human being at the centre of it. It’s not simple to say head or heart, but I would say a little bit more head than heart, being objective and fact-based.

You’ve had many successes, but what would you consider a personal failure?

A social impact for-profit startup focused on rural markets, which is still operating in East Africa and in Kenya. That startup touched six million lives. But my inability to scale it beyond a certain point, coming from a corporate environment and working on very large businesses, meant I assumed it would be easy.

What would you tell your younger self to stop worrying about?

To stop worrying about your failures and about things you don’t control. Honestly, I don’t worry because I sleep very early at night. I don’t take any stress to heart.

Isn’t that easier to say because of your position in the pecking order?

People have strengths, and they need to have a clear plan and think about what they want to do in their work and careers. Focus on your strengths and the objectives you set out as a company. Then it’s a matter of time; success will happen. It’s not very complicated.

How do you look at life?

Life has a good mix of experiences that one goes through. I think the most important thing is to take the positives and leave behind the negatives. People tend to dwell on the latter, and it eats away at them and the people around them. Success or failure doesn’t matter.

When you look back at the 63 years of your life, what feelings come to you?

I’m blessed. I grew up middle class in Calcutta, in the eastern part of India. I never thought I would study where I studied or go global. If somebody had told me that I would live in Singapore, spend a little time in the US, and work in global roles, I would have disbelieved them. I’m blessed, I’m lucky, I’m fortunate to have had the opportunities.

Many people will look at you and admire and want your life. But what do you envy about other people?

Every person has something you can envy and admire. I have some colleagues in my company who are very talented because they understand the history of the world. Some can play music. Some are good presenters.

Even in this interview, I expected you to talk a lot about business. But you asked me about my personal life. I’m very impressed. I don’t think there are specific things because that’s what brings you to appreciate life.

What do you wish more people understood about you?

That I am a normal human being like anybody else. I have a position, but at the core of me is just a plain, simple human being.

Is there something you are secretly good at that we don’t know?

Haha! I think I’m secretly good at problem-solving and negotiating because I’m a good listener. I do play some music, a little bit of violin and mouth organ. Problem-solving is not an easy skill, but every problem can be solved, and if people are good at problem-solving, any job becomes easier.

Having been to all those 50 countries, what is one lesson you’ve picked that you’re going to pass down to your twins?

You need to appreciate different cultures: their food habits, the way they do things, talk, and communicate. And be adaptable, be humble. I grew up as a vegetarian, but I have morphed into a meat-eater. And I have experienced all kinds of meat, from Japanese to Chinese to Korean to Kenyan.

Most people get more calcified in who they are as they grow older. You are doing the opposite, why?

Haha! You build on your strengths. I know that has worked for me. I might as well become more. For instance, I’m teaching myself how to build an AI agent. And these are not easy things. When I was doing my startup, I had to do my own bookkeeping when I was already in my 50s. I can even shoot a video and edit it. When you teach yourself a new skill and are adaptable, you feel good about yourself.

When is it enough?

Once upon a time, I used to think I wanted to retire at 60. But it’s very clear to me, I’ll be dead if I retire too early. So I want to keep working until I’m immobile. And if I become less mobile because of physical ailments or mental ailments, then I will stop.

What matters more than you thought it would?

Luckily, my family is in a good position. I want to make sure they are taken care of. From a work-related perspective, I want to ensure I build a lasting organisation. I want to give my children what I have learned. It may not work for them, but I want them to be responsible. Now it’s more about giving back.

How then do you reward yourself?

My reward is simple. People think well of me. People are not fighting with me. I think that’s a good enough reward. When you’re doing something good and you don’t get positive feedback, obviously it hurts me. But then you move on. That’s a reward in itself because after some time, your lifestyle doesn’t change. You do what you do, you have the same apartment you go to, the same food et al.

What’s your superpower?

Haha! I build a lot of trust and confidence in people around me. Wherever I have friends, family or work, I don’t think there’s anybody who will say they distrust me or lack confidence in me. So that trust and confidence factor is very important to me.

We see the success, what don’t we see?

Not sure there’s much, but there’s one thing I could have done better. At every stage of life, I had friends and colleagues. When I moved to the next chapter, I didn’t keep in touch consistently. I reconnected with them later, but not continuously. Maybe, similarly to family, there could have been more contact. But again, it’s a matter of choice. That is one price I’ve paid. I’ve lost a lot of friends. I reconnected with them when I got time, but not enough.

Does it ever worry you that when you finally start slowing down, you won’t have built enough strong relationships for that time?

It might, but I have a few very close friends. We stay in touch with those friends, and they will be my support. My parents are still alive. My dad is 94, my mum is 86. My wife’s family has two siblings, and her parents are also alive. So we are very close-knit, and we stay in touch with family, my uncles and aunts. There is enough of a support system.

But yes, when I hang up my boots and am no longer working, I wish I had 100 friends, 200 friends, and not 10 or 20.

Who is someone you’ll never forget, and how did they impact your life?

My wife. I share everything that I do, whether work-related or otherwise, with her. She has been my support system for the last 30-plus years since we got married. Clearly, she has been through all the ups and downs of my life, so I can never forget her.

With how much you travel, how do you maintain that emotional bond with her?

In India, we marry once, and we stay married forever. So that’s a hard question, but the good news is she is a person who wants to track my children or me wherever we are all the time and at least have one or two calls per day. She does a very good job of staying connected. I think she is a wonderful people person. She has a lot more friends than I have and maintains contact, and in that sense, I am jealous of how she does it.

What are you doing well as a husband?

I’d say not enough [chuckles]. But I am truthful to her, number one. Number two, I have been a good parent to the children. She is very religious, and I have given a lot of respect to her religion and temples. While we have different opinions in terms of lifestyle and holidays, I have always relied on her decisions about what we need to do. I have tried to do things to make her happy, but maybe I should have done more.

What did your first heartbreak teach you?

I didn’t have any heartbreak [chuckles]. In India, dating is not that common, especially in my generation. Mine was an arranged marriage, and the two families introduced us to each other. But it so happened that my wife’s brother was working at the same company I was working for. I went to see my wife, and I liked her. She liked me.

Was that good for your marriage?

Very good. Because there was no judgment in terms of who she was or who she thought I was. It was two strangers entering a marriage, and it worked out very well.

What is one thing you have finally come to terms with?

Sometimes you want to do things your way, but then you realise it may come at the cost of someone’s confidence or peace. While it might sometimes be the right thing to do, you say, “Okay, I’m going to back off. I’m not going to make this decision this way.”

If you could teach the world one thing, what would it be?

I would say two things. I think most people underestimate their capabilities. And most people don’t think they can punch above their weight. I’ve seen amazing stories of people who were like this and went on to do this, whether in society, in a company or in a family. There’s so much talent out there.

What’s life’s simplest pleasure?

Just being yourself. You know, just enjoying one full day without thinking about anything. Eating what you want to eat, watching a show you want to watch, and not dressing up for an event in jackets and suits. So, be yourself.

What is your most controversial opinion?

The way the world is fighting between religions and between countries, it’s not needed. I don’t know who is trying to prove what, but there is no need for disruptions, tensions or war. When I get into this kind of discussion, people get very polarised. Everybody stands for something. I don’t know why people stand so strongly for anything.

Give us some good advice.

Never feel dissatisfied with your life. My brother-in-law was also the CEO of a bank and has recently written a book, and one of the themes he writes about is being happily dissatisfied.

If you are dissatisfied with something, work on it, but get to a point where you don’t continue being dissatisfied. Be happily dissatisfied. Don’t be too satisfied, because if you’re too satisfied, it means you’re not pushing yourself.

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