Five steps to assess a boss with toxic traits

Additionally, the often quoted but frequently misunderstood Machiavellianism involves manipulative behaviours that focus on their own self-interest and personal gain. Lastly, psychopathy includes impulsivity, complete lack of empathy for others or remorse for their own actions that you can actually see through general callousness.

However, readers requested specific advice on what to do if their current boss exhibits any or all of the wretched dark triad of negative personality traits. So, let us proceed and utilise psychologist Leanne ten Brinke’s recommendations encapsulated in her fascinating and disturbing book Poisonous People.

In reality, we cannot always leave a job when circumstances are bad since we may not have another immediate career option.
But it is key to realise that bosses with dark personality traits are unlikely to change over time, especially if they do not have a motivation to do so.

So, the question is not whether the person can change but rather whether the reality can be contained enough to make staying worthwhile and not toxic and dangerous.

First, you can consider staying even with a dark triad boss if the rules of the workplace, both formally and informally, are written down and followed. Psychopaths, narcissistic, and Machiavellian bosses thrive where there is a lack of clarity and consistency that can enable their manipulation of staff.

Second, if there is strong team cohesion at your workplace and you also fit tightly within that strong team, then the group unity creates a buffer between the manipulation of a dark triad boss and the staff because it causes a real cost for the boss since the team may gang up to protect each other from bad behaviours.

Third, the team actually provides you with a support network that is effective. It is one thing to be cohesive and unified. But it is a step deeper to actually support each other with advice, care, joint reporting of bad behaviour up the chain, serving as witnesses of bad behaviour to human resources, informing regulators if dark triad trait holders cross certain unacceptable boundaries. Be sure that cohesion turns into action, not just mutual complaining.

Fourth, as long as the stress from the bad boss does not cross over into affecting your own stress and anxiety outside of work that negatively impacts your life satisfaction. No job is worth mental health abuse. So, harm reduction by leaving the job is valid in such instances.

Read: Why personality still defines great leaders

Fifth, keep evidence. Do not think that you will document it later. Do not make assumptions that your colleagues will serve as witnesses later when and if needed. Collect evidence now. Each week, be sure to reflect and write about the time the boss publicly insulted you while publicly praising themselves. Send emails to confirm bad behaviour so there is a record.

When bosses ask you to violate policies, confirm it in writing with an email follow-up. A text or WhatsApp message is not sufficient enough. You do not have to take a risk and specifically state they are violating policy. Your email creating evidence can be something to the effect of:

“Thank you for our meeting earlier today. Please allow me to confirm that you have requested me to do action 1, action 2, and action 3, etc…...” Often times the boss will not respond. But you solidify your claim later of what they did.

In summary, remember that dark triad trait bosses will not change over time. Do not endlessly forgive them. Only stay in the role if you can comfortably achieve steps one through five above.

If you fear that perhaps you might possess one or more of the dark triad personality traits, then go online and take a quick free two-minute self-assessment at openpsychometrics.org/tests/SD3/

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